We live in an age of paralysis by fear, where many voices attempt to dictate and control our thoughts and decisions.

Fear can paralyze everything that’s good in life. Left unchecked, it seizes your dream, suffocating all unrealized potential by constantly reminding you how badly you failed the last time you tried to be yourself.

This creates a sense of desperation, real or perceived, pushing people to live lives of constant compromise and limitations.

It’s very dangerous, but if you stop a moment, open your eyes and look around, you’ll see for better or for worse, this is our society. It’s become a desperate situation.

My son and I recently discussed the fear factor and how it holds many hostage, putting their dreams to death. He said our conversation reminded him of his favorite quote, “Every­­thing you want is on the other side of fear” by Jack Canfield.

The words excited my soul, rushing over me like thousands of voices, so strong they completely silenced the voice of fear. Then the thought occurred to me, “Where have the voices of our fathers’ gone? For it’s the sound of their voices and the words of wisdom from their well-worn years that silence the voice of fear in the hearts of our children.”

It has been said “the hands that rock the cradle rule the world.” But what if the hands that handle fear rule the hearts of all men? Nothing puts fear in its place like the presence of a father.

Sometimes we all find ours­elves in need of a father. Where there’s no father, fear’s allowed to drive the heart out of control.

There’s this ancient Hebrew proverb that says,” He that has no rule over his own spirit is like a city that’s broken down and without walls.”

The bottom line: Children aren’t meant to be left alone. And they’re not going to learn to exercise self-control or face their fears, without fear-handling fathers training them how to rule their hearts and quench the flames of fear-breathing dragons.

If you’re reading this and are self-controlled, your city has strong walls and you’ve defeated all your childhood dragons, please reach out to your father and thank him for teaching and showing you how to overcome dragons and rule your heart while you were young.

My dad was a dragon killer. I’d give anything to be able to thank him for showing me how to silence the voice of fear in my heart and the hearts of my children.

I also dream of a place where every fatherless child can find help putting fear in its place, rebuilding their broken walls and ruling over their own spirit. I want to be a place where kids learn to put their fears to death before their fears put them to death.

Dr. T.J. Kimble of Radcliff is a clinical pastoral counselor. He can be reached at tj@yourbestlifenowcounseling.com.

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