There’s something powerful about humility.

Before you reduce the idea of humility to an old, worn-out doormat that everyone wipes their feet on without consequence, consider the possibility there might be more to the mat than meets the eye.

Humility has the power to heal the human heart and soul. The truth is meekness isn’t weakness, it’s power under control. Meekness is the internal power residing within each one of us giving us the ability, to humbly influence another human soul, to become the change we want to see in others and our world.

Authentic humility is one of the most powerful forces in the universe and we mortals are most like our maker when we exercise meekness as a lifestyle.

Most of us would rather not eat healthy portions of humble pie as part of a meekness regiment. But one of the most powerfully healing attributes of humility is the ability to fully embrace when you are wrong. It take authenticity to humbly hug and embrace your wrong and accept responsibility for your actions.

This idea was as foreign to me as speaking Tibetan, but as I began to realize the absolute power of ownership and the powerlessness of blaming others, I decided to learn a new language. It’s about actually becoming a real grown up who uses the power of humility to heal himself and to influence others to grow up and be healed as well.

This thought process makes me think of something I read in a book once, “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.”

When I was first married, I never would tell my wife anything was my fault. In fact, to me, marriage was another competition and I always won all competitions or I just didn’t play at all. Typical all-or-nothing thinking was wrecking any chance of real intimacy and protecting my insecure man-child ego.

Now almost 25 years later, I’m the most non-competitive Texan who’s quick to pat my chest and say, “That’s mine I did that and I take full responsibility for my actions.”

Humility heals relationships faster than anything because the way it works empowers you to grow up. Once you start practicing authentic humility, you begin attracting other grown-ups who are secure in their relationships with themselves and others and you will repel adult children who are insecure in themselves and who have not embraced the healing power of humility.

Genuine humility ends the masquerade and you stop being part of the problem and start becoming part of the solution. As long as you blame, you can’t become because you enslave yourself to the control of others.

Humility doesn’t reduce you to a human doormat. Rather, it raises you to the place where you take back control of yourself and you respectively ask and expect others to take control of themselves as well.

I know, I know. So many people are skeptical that others will take unfair advantage of them if they practice humility and others don’t reciprocate with equal humility in return.

Questions are powerful tools. Humbly framed questions have the power to let all the wind out of the sail of people who are attempting to make you their doormat. Good questions do one of two things with controlling people, they either help them drill down and be honest with themselves or they eventually drive them away as they refuse to humble themselves and take ownership for their part in the problem. If someone leaves angrily after you ask a humbly honest question then realize that a gently framed question has the power to break a bone.

What do any of us actually control? You live in a fantasy world if you think you control others. Humility empowers you to control how you respond to others; so much for meekness being weakness and allowing others to tread over your life.

Meekness is power under control. Before you decide to push around a meek person, you might want to stop and consider how powerful humility’s push back really is.

And don’t be surprised when you step into humility’s power if everyone around you doesn’t line up to celebrate your forward progress. They liked you better as a misinformed doormat, not a humbly empowered soul healer.

Dr. T.J. Kimble of Radcliff is a clinical pastoral counselor. He can be reached at tj@yourbestlifenowcounseling.com.

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